Saturday, July 05, 2008

Mortality Check

It's not often that I'm at a loss for words but this post has been very difficult to write. The Kay is sad; she is mourning. One of the things I hate most about getting older is that I'm losing people. And wax melancholy at what I call a "mortality check", i.e., a mental hotfoot that sets me thinking about why I'm still here.

I, like many of you, have lost two people I greatly enjoy and admire in the Blogosphere recently: Joycelyn Ward of Maya's Granny and Winston Rand of Nobody Asked . . . . Both were wonderful voices in the Blogosphere and they will be greatly missed by many. Joycelyn passed away after a long recovery from a serious illness; Winston's illness was quick and unexpected.

I didn't get to know Joycelyn well except through her blog and I admired her greatly for her outstanding insights, wit, and wisdom. She was a great lady whose contributions gave me a great deal of food for thought. Her daughter, Julie, has written several excellent, loving posts there in her memory.

Winston was a definite friend. I call people like him Friends I've Never Met of which all y'all who stop by here are a part. If I moaned and groaned about a computer dilemma here, there would be an email from him post haste with a diagnosis and a fix. He and I both were fans of Thoreau and we'd send each links about him now and again. I always enjoyed stopping by his place for a dose of his wry humor and cutting insights. His beloved wife, aka Roomie, has written a lovely memorial about him on his blog.

The memorials written by both Julie and Roomie set me a-thinking but I'm not going there for now. I share their loss and have both families in my prayers.

May they both be in the loving arms of a loving and gracious God. I shall miss them both greatly.



  1. Kay, isn't it incredible this mourning for friends we've never met. Who would have suspected that there would be friends like that ten years ago? Yet, like you, I feel the loss that Joycelyn's death has created and I follow Julie's blog and pray that she and her family find peaceful acceptance. I send you my thoughts as well.

  2. These are loving comments and they both would appreciate your tributes to them. That is what "legacy" is all about. I'm proud to be among your FINM.

  3. I also mourn Maya's granny, but was not aware of Winston. It is indeed remarkable how we can mourn those we've never met - but it is a wonderful thing that we can feel so deeply about those afar.

  4. Oh my.
    I have only been blogging for a few short months and never got a chance to read their blogs much.
    I have bookmarked both of them and will read their past posts.
    Thank you Kay for linking to them.


  5. I know what you mean. It's sometimes even harder to mourn someone you've never met in person but know by heart.

  6. I can't explain how deeply crushed I've been by these deaths. Joycelyn was so wonderful and when she fell ill in February it hurt to see her spirit bruised...and I truly don't think she ever got past it. All of Julie's updates kept us informed, and by the time she did wasn't a total shock; but it still hurt immensely nonetheless.

    Winston...on the other hand....was so unexpected and SO painful....I wasn't sure I was actually absorbing it. As you've said Kay...he was so generous with his time...and himself...he e-mailed all the time and shared his humor, his advice...or just wanted to say 'hi.' A true southern gentleman...that was Winston. One day so day...gone. My heart broke. I still get weepy. We lost two wonderfully talented friends....our community will dearly miss them both.

  7. You wrote true on this. It is a loss when we get to know someone even if we have never actually met them or even heard them speak. It makes me sad but it's part of life and a good reminder to us all to make each day count. None of us get guarantees for when it'll be our turn.


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