I'm invoking executive privilege today. (I am the executive or somesuch here -- aren't I?) My reason for doing so is so I can share these wonderfully punny groaners with y'all on this, our nation's birthday! I'm sure y'all will find at least one that will give a hearty groooaaannn!!! Enjoy!!!!!!!!
* What quacks, has webbed feet, and betrays his country?
* What did Paul Revere say at the end of his ride?
"I gotta get a softer saddle!"
* What protest by a group of dogs occurred in 1773?
The Boston Flea Party!
* What happened as a result of the Stamp Act?
The Americans licked the British!
* Why did Paul Revere ride his horse from Boston to Lexington?
Because the horse was too heavy to carry!
* Why did the British cross the Atlantic?
To get to the other tide!
* What do you call a parade of German mercenaries?
A Hessian procession!
* What would you get if you crossed a patriot with a small curly-haired dog?
* Did you hear the one about the Liberty Bell?
Yeah, it cracked me up!
* What would you get if you crossed George Washington with cattle feed?
The Fodder of Our Country!
* What did one flag say to the other flag?
Nothing. It just waved!
* What's red, white, black and blue?
Uncle Sam falling down the steps!
* Where did George Washington buy his hatchet?
At the chopping mall!
* What kind of tea did the American colonists thirst for?
* What was General Washington's favorite tree?
* What would you get if you crossed Washington's home with nasty insects?
* What did a patriot put on his dry skin?
* Who is a dog's favorite Founding Father?
And my personal favorite . . .
* Which colonists told the most jokes?