I don't handle loss well. I also don't handle nasty people well so when the two are combined, it's damned near fatal.
My ex-husband -- now my friend -- died yesterday from a massive stroke after several days of suffering. He held my hand almost to the end. I will miss him greatly. It's been an ordeal and I haven't handled it well but I take comfort that we were friends at the end. Our so-called adult children haven't been very nice to me and that hurts a lot. I'm not going to elaborate but I'm not too happy (gross understatement).
Desperate times call for desperate measures so there will be some changes as soon as I get my head, heart and mind cleared for take off.