Friday, October 26, 2007

The Friday Groaner!!!!!!

It's Friday and hopefully the really great grooooaaaaaannnn you're going to get here today isn't because you had a rough week! Terri Murphy, who reads this blog, wrote me that this timely groaner came her way and she thought of me. I can't thank her enough for her thoughtfulness and hope she contributes more as this an extraordinarily fine example of a groaner! Get ready to laugh, cry, and groan!!!!!!!

A man is walking home alone late one foggy Halloween night, when behind him he hears:

BUMP . . .

BUMP . . .

BUMP . . .

Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog he makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street toward him.

BUMP . . .

BUMP . . .

BUMP . . .

Terrified, the man begins to run toward his home, the casket bouncing quickly behind him.

FASTER . . .

FASTER . . .

BUMP . . .

BUMP. . .

BUMP . . .

He runs to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, rushes in, slams and locks the door behind him. However, the casket crashes through his door, with the lid of the casket clapping on his heels . . .

clappity-BUMP . . .

clappity-BUMP . . .

clappity-BUMP. . .

as the terrified man runs.

Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, he locks himself in. His heart is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is coming in sobbing gasps.

With a loud CRASH the casket breaks down the door bumping and clapping toward him.

The man screams and reaches for something, anything, but all he can find is a bottle of cough syrup! Desperate, he throws the cough syrup at the casket . . .

and . . .

Are you're ready for this?????

The coffin stops.

GRRROOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAANNNNN!!!!!!

Happy Halloween!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy Blogging!!!!!!!!!

Kay

7 comments:

  1. Ohhh-o-o-o, what have I come back to after a long absence from visiting here due to "life happening" ???

    I took a few minutes to review a few of your older blogs -- so what have you been doin' lately ???

    All I can say, is concentrate on those Bucks -- they're doing pretty good the last I knew!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I wrote a comment earlier, but think it "disappeared." If this is a duplicate, you can trash one.

    What I wrote was -- Ohhh! What have I come back to after an absence from your blog due to my "life happening" !!!

    I took a few minutes to review some of your older posts -- so, what cha been doin' lately???

    All I can suggest is, focus on those "Bucks" -- the last I knew they're doing pretty well.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous3:12 PM

    It's not the coff that carries you ough,
    it's the coughin' they carries you ough in ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  4. @Anon,
    interesting syllable that "ough".
    It has 9 (=nine!)) different pronounciations in English.
    Bough, cough, dough, ought, thorough, through, rough, lough,
    and hiccough. So it took me a while to get your sentence to rhyme ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  5. That one is just sick... sick I tell you. I mean, caskets are after all a very grave subject...

    ReplyDelete
  6. Arrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!!!!!! You guys are the sick ones -- taking groaners to new depths!

    ReplyDelete
  7. My computer didn't show the punch line. It just says "are you ready for this?"
    then there is a blank space and then your sign off: "happy blogging"

    How does it end?
    a

    ReplyDelete

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