A guy walks into a bar, orders a drink and sits down. As he sits down he hears someone say, "That's a nice suit, sir".(And damn it Blogger screwed up the dammed settings and I can't format this properly!!!!)
He looks around and there is no-one there. Then again he hears, "That's a nice suit, sir" and he looks down and it is one of the peanuts in the tray speaking to him.
Taken off guard, he goes to the cigarette machine, puts in his money, when the machine says to him, "F*#@ off".
The guy tries once more but again the machine tells him to f*#@ off!
The guy goes to the barman and says "Your bar is weird mate. The peanuts say how nice my suit is but the cigarette tells me to get lost!
What sort of establishment are you running here?" The bartender replies, "Oh no sir, it's not what you think . . . . . . the peanuts are complimentary, but the cigarette machine is out of order."