Thursday, February 28, 2008

The Friday Groaner!!!!!

Please welcome Naomi Hagen Bloom of A Little Red Hen who sent this excellent contribution along. It's not a groaner in the strictest sense but it left me howling with laughter and the punch line is a great big "Ouch!" so I thought I would share it with y'all. And thanks, Naomi, for introducing me to Maryannaville -- it's a hoot!

At trial, a Southern small -town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman, to the stand. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"

She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"

She again replied, "Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him."

The defense attorney nearly died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'm sending both of you both to the electric chair!"


Happy Blogging!!!!!!!!!



  1. Of course, none of our real life lawyers and judges would ever live llives like these guys ... right? (Ha Ha Ha)

  2. Not a "groaner" but a good laugh before heading off to work today!
    Thank you!

  3. I know some old women who would probably act just like that on the witness stand!

  4. Oh geeze Kay, please stop making me laugh coffee all over my laptop.

    Must remember to stop drinking coffee while reading Kay's blog!

  5. geez, kay,

    that's the trouble with my being a conceptual artist: always miss the fine points as in the correct definition of a groaner. glad you enjoyed it.



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