Tuesday, June 04, 2013

Thank you and Afterthoughts

I sincerely appreciate all the kind words y'all have left here in this difficult time for our family. I decided long ago that if I really wanted to call myself a Christian (and I don't anymore), that I had to forgive others even if they hurt me. I always fall back on Gandhi: "I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians; they are so unlike your Christ." I don't claim to be perfect, but I do try not to compromise myself -- unlike so many we read about every day.

My mother is a hater and bitterness has consumed her. Frankly, I think hating is too much work and requires too much energy. I don't care to expend all that negative energy -- it eats one soul and doesn't accomplish a damned thing. And I see too many self-proclaimed Christians (from both sides) acting in horrendously un-Christ-like ways whose views and actions are counter-productive to achieving peace and happiness for our country and that saddens me greatly.

I can't shoulder that burden; I'm just trying mightily to tend my my little corner of the world as best I can. I'm just glad that I'm managing to get through all the craziness without selling my soul -- so far.

Happy Blogging!!!!

Kay

18 comments:

  1. I found a long time ago, that misery loves company... but I CHOSE not to be that company.
    I stay away from the negative and head towards the positive.. I know in this world there is a lot of negative to side step... but I chose to think of it as their luggage and not mine. So I don't carry it. It has made my life a lot happier. And at my age, I need a lot less luggage to carry. So stay true to your self.. and shake your head sadly at those who don't.

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  2. Agree totally. I have several relatives I don't see very often anymore because they are haters or otherwise negative. It is even more uncomfortable since I am the normal target of their negativity. Like you and Voltaire's Candide I will tend my gardens and not concern myself about those things I can't do anything about. Good luck to you.

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  3. Kudos! Did I say that already?

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  4. Good for you, Kay, agree it takes more energy to hate and be bitter than it does to forgive.

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  5. I hear you, Kay. I wish you peace today.

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  6. Anonymous5:24 PM

    Haven't visited blogs for a long time, but my mouse brought me to you on this day. I'm sorry things have been so hard in your family lately. We get to pick our friends but not our family. My 49-year-old daughter, 8 years in recovery, moved home for a year last month. We often had a volatile relationship, but I'm so grateful we are having this opportunity to rebuild as a mom and daughter. I'm no longer very controlling and the 12 steps have helped her enormously with some of her own issues. Still working 3 days a week and hanging in there at 75. I'll check in from time to time. I don't post very often anymore at Sacred Ordinary but I do use Facebook briefly daily.

    Condolences on the loss of your ex. I remember you saying that he sometimes fixed your computer. That was a real blessing to be able to be with your kids and some of your grandkids.

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  7. Anonymous4:28 PM

    I do so agree with Gandhi in his sentiments. Thanks for the quote. Pax vobiscum.
    Cop Car

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  8. Amen to what both you and Gandhi said.

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  9. Seems like a lot of us are confronting these issues right now.

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  10. It seems this spring has been full of loss for you, and I am sorry to hear that. I would have thought that any and all adult children would have been happy to know you were able to be a comfort to your ex husband, but people often surprise me with their odd reactions. Good for you on the non-smoking front. I quit about ten years ago, mainly because the price of cigarettes got too high for my cheapness! Don't worry too much if you fall off every once in a while; it takes most people more than one try to make it stick. Hope the rest of the summer will be good to you - storms coming to you tonight, I'm afraid.

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  11. Yup, Christians often don't folow their own rules. I find it interesting that many mother's of that era are like that....angry and resentful. Never forgetting their anger either.

    You just take care of you. I'll catch up.

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  12. I have always liked that Gandhi quote. I am sorry for your loss. Hugs VB

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  13. There's a thing that keeps coming round on Facebook about the Buddha saying that hating someone was like dying yourself when you give them poison.

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  14. So sorry about that anger. My mother was like that too. G's mother not only got angry, she carried her resentments around forever. I'm really grateful that I forget things so easily.

    Thanks for your lovely note.

    I'm so sorry about his death, but I am glad the family came. Glad too the stories were good. My ex-is near death, and my forgettery is at work again.

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  15. Dear Kay...So sorry for your loss, my dear....Sorry I have not been around. It is very very hard to lose someone you have been so very close to....My heart goes out to you, my dear Kay.....Take good care of yourself.

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  16. I just wanted to see how you are. I hope you are doing well and everything is going okay now. Have a nice weekend!

    You and the family are in my thoughts and prayers.

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  17. Always admire your spirit, Kay. The way you get up after being knocked down and find ways to move ahead. I hope that the time since you wrote this has been brought some lightness into your world. You've often brought it to me--and your followers.

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  18. I was very touched by your note on Ronnie's blog this morning. I have half a family like yours, and I care. Hugs.

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