The Kay is doing all she can to keep this feature going! I just committed theft -- sorta - to post this one. Actually I do have this groaner in the archives but Chancy over at driftwoodinspiration posted it recently and I decided to swipe it (while giving her credit) and share it with y'all while introducing y'all (if you haven't met this darling Southern Belle already) to a really enjoyable blog!!!!
One Christmas Eve, a frenzied young man ran into a pet shop looking for an unusual Christmas gift for his wife. The shop owner suggested a parrot, named Chet, who could sing Christmas carols. This seemed like the perfect gift.
"How do I get him to sing?" The young man asked, excitedly.
"Simply hold a lighted match directly under his feet like this." was the shop owner's reply.
Chet began to sing "Jingle Bells! Jingle Bells! . . ."
The shop owner then held another match under the parrot's right foot. Then Chet's tune changed, and the air was filled with "Silent Night, Holy Night . . ."
The young man was so impressed that he paid the shopkeeper and ran home as quickly as he could with Chet under his arm.
When the wife saw her gift she was overwhelmed. "How beautiful!" She exclaimed, "Can he talk?"
"No," the young man replied, "But he can sing -- let me show you."
So the young man whipped out his lighter and placed it under Chet's left foot, as the shopkeeper had shown him, and Chet crooned, "Jingle Bells!
The man then moved the lighter to Chet's right foot, and out came, "Silent Night. Holy Night. . . "The wife, her face filled with curiosity, then asked, "What if we hold the lighter between his legs?" The man did not know. "
Let's try it." He answered, eager to please his wife.
So they held the lighter between Chet's legs. Chet twisted his face, cleared his throat, the little parrot sang out loudly (like it was the performance of his life), "Chet's nuts roasting on an open fire . . ."