Here's a really excellent -- if a tad irreverent -- groaner that Alice of My Wintersong sent along. I think y'all will get a truly hearty giggle and groan from it!
A man is stumbling through the woods totally drunk when he comes upon a preacher who is baptizing people in the river. He proceeds to walk into the water and subsequently bumps into the preacher.
The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of alcohol whereupon he asks the drunk, "Are you ready to find Jesus?"
The drunk shouts, "Yes, I am!"
So the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the water. He pulls him up and asks the drunk, "Brother, have you found Jesus?"
The drunk replies, "No, I haven't found Jesus."
Shocked, the preacher dunks him into the water again, this time a little longer.
He again pulls him out of the water and asks, "Have you found Jesus, my brother?"
Again the drunk answers "No, I haven't found Jesus!"
By this time the preacher is at his wits end and dunks the drunk in the water again -- this time holding him down for about 30 seconds until he begins kicking his arms and legs before he pulls him up. And again he asks the drunk, "For the love of God, have you found Jesus?"
Are you ready for this????
Don't say I didn't warn you!!!!!!
The drunk wipes his eyes, catches his breath and says to the preacher, "Are you sure this is where he fell in?"